Where Whine Meets Wine

The Know-It-All Who Doesn’t Know It ALL

on March 7, 2012

I’m a little bit sad… I wrote a post and really loved it, and then MissE walked up, pushed a button, and away it went, never to be found again. Boo. Hiss. Timeout. (Ok, so she didn’t go to time out, but I did.) I will attempt to rewrite it, but you know how that goes (if not, I’ll tell you:), it’s never the same. Because while I was feeling inspired when I wrote it the first time, now I’m just annoyed and cranky.

The last month or two I have gotten e-mails, comments, messages, and even some texts from my dearly beloved friends, both ones I see on a regular basis and ones I haven’t seen in years but stay in touch with via the computer. I have been asked some really hard questions. Which has led to a comment or two, wondering about what claims do I have on the expert title and so I am here to set the record straight. I, in no way, shape, or form, claim to be an expert. On anything. Really. I am just one woman who is also a wife, a mother, a sister, a daughter, a friend, and also happens to be a blogger.  That is not to say I don’t have opinions on things, in fact, I think that is saying I have opinions on things. Just not the say-all, end-all opinion. I do admit to some level of know-it-all-ness on my part (I do not like not knowing things), but I, by no means, know it all. Got it? Good.

In trying to come up with really great answers to some hard questions, it has caused me to go back and forth in my answers. Because I don’t believe there is a one-size-fits-all answers for most questions. Because there isn’t a one-size-fits-all life for most people. I know that my road (you know, the one that got me from there to here) has had twists, turns, and a few dead ends that I can clearly recall. Along the way I have been told by others that I was on the wrong path; that I’d lost my direction; that I should have taken an exit or two along the way… but through it all, I honestly never believed I was lost. I always knew that it was my path. I knew I was heading down my road, to my destination.

I truly believe in living with intention. In treating people the way we’d intend to if we stopped and thought about our actions, instead of just reacting. And maybe by default, I believe in us each having our own paths in our own lives, and in supporting each other as we go along those paths. Do I have opinions, thoughts, and beliefs that I feel strongly about and believe are the “right” way. Of course. Do I wish I could push a button and pass them on to you, occasionally. Will I judge you and tell you your way is wrong, if it’s not what I would do…no. At least, I strive not to!  I have to believe that God made us unique individuals for a reason, and that alone makes it something that should be celebrated (and supported!!) and not condemned.
So go ahead, twist, turn, exit… do what you need to do, on your road, to get you to your destination. And yes, feel free to ask for help along the way. Sometimes, someone has already paved the way and could offer insight into how to make your road a little smoother.
People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost. – H. Jackson Browne
It reminded me, of this:
I’m at the checkout, and the lady behind me starts making small talk as we wait. Why do they stick those order separator things so far out of your reach anyways? I smile and agree it’s ridiculous. And then this stranger showed me kindness. She looked at me and said, “You must have small children.”  I quickly look myself over trying to find the stamp (or hand print) that screamed, “I’m a mom.” I didn’t see any. Unless the state of my hair, my sweatpants, and the exhaustion in my eyes count. I smiled and said 3 and asked how she could tell.. She just smiled and said she’d recognized the look of exhaustion the can only be caused by 2 types of parenting: the under 3 crowd or the teenage crowd. And since I didn’t look old enough to have teenagers, it must be the former. I smiled and nodded, then asked her, “Teenagers?” She smiled, and I saw the exhaustion in her eyes as well as she nodded. And that was the the long and the short of our “conversation.” But somehow, afterwards I felt a little bit more refreshed. I think that it offered some sense of community. A moment of “I’ve been there before.” combined with “we’ve all got our own struggles,”  that made me feel a sense of the bigger picture as well. They’re not little for long, we all have different struggles, each as unique, and as hard, and as scary, and as sad as anyone else’s, because they are our own. But for a brief moment in time, I felt like I wasn’t alone in my struggle after all. So the next time you’re at the grocery store, the gas station, walking down the road… offer a little support to those you meet. Even if it’s only in the form of a smile. You never know how life changing (even if momentarily) it can be.

7 responses to “The Know-It-All Who Doesn’t Know It ALL

  1. Christine says:

    You’re so right and I agree… who has the right to set the standards on how one should be anyway? My mom always said I was unique and I felt very special until I heard her telling my sister the same thing. Then fast forward forty years later when I’m telling my kids the same thing. The key in the phrase that I somehow didn’t pay attention to was “In your own way…”

    And thanks for reminding me to mind my surroundings, I need to make an effort to smile more!

  2. I love reading your blog and was honored to receive the Liebster Blog Award… I would now love to pass it along to you!

  3. flamidwyfe says:

    Awesome post! And I bet you made that lady’s day by talking to her…
    p.s. your 2nd typing of this post was probably more awesome than the first! 🙂

  4. What were the credentials of Abraham, Paul, David, Moses….etc. He leads, we follow. We stumble. I think our stumbles and fumbles and His lifting us up is what we are suppose to talk about. And listen to. You go girl!

  5. […] this scenario, that I will be more intentional about my interactions with strangers. I’ve had strangers make my day seem worthwhile, and I’ve had strangers make my day infinitely worse.  That’s the […]

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