Where Whine Meets Wine

A Letter To My (Former) Self

Have you ever thought about all the things that you wish you’d known: a) as a child; b) in high school; c) in college; d) when you woke up this morning? I have. More than once. Now I know that you can’t really go back and redo things otherwise you wouldn’t be where you are now… and really, I’m happy where I am now. But it would be nice if I could go back in time and at least some of the heartbreak, or worry less, or something.  And so if I could whisper in the ear of my former self, during some life-changing moments, these are some of the things I would say.

  • You will recover. You will move on. You will be safe.
  • Childhood really doesn’t last forever… enjoy every carefree moment you have.
  • Do not let anyone treat you as disposable. You are not.
  • Dispose of him. Dispose of him quickly.
  • You will not have to make excuses for someone who really loves you.
  • Be loud! Be funny! Be you and enjoy being you!
  • Their opinions of you are less important than the way you feel about being you. Focus on that.
  • You really can love your first kiss forever.
  • You can think feministically while holding on to your desire for children. You don’t have to choose one or the other.
  • You don’t have to have it all figured out all the time.
  • Marriage is going to be harder than you ever imagined and better than you ever dreamed.
  • There is an adjustment period when he comes home from a deployment. Prepare for it.
  • Your husband is never going to be able to read your mind.
  • I repeat: your husband is never going to be able to read your mind.
  • Children are going to change your views and opinions on so many things, people, and ideas.
  • Peanut butter on a spoon and applesauce will get you through your pregnancies buy in bulk.
  • Your children will make you feel like you are the most impatient person in the world. Start praying for patience now.
  • Eventually, they will start picking up their own toys.
  • Your husband will never learn the workings of a laundry basket/hamper. So just give it up.
  • The people you love will not be here indefinitely. Love them all you can, every minute.
  • Life goes by faster than you can ever imagine. So hold them close, cuddle them all you can, always be willing to dole out kisses to the owwies, keep your camera in hand, and love like crazy.