laborofwonder

Where Whine Meets Wine

The New Accessory?


When you were a little girl (or a little boy), did you ever sit and daydream about the days to come where you’d be in the midst of parental joys? And then your mind would wander to the days when you’d be judged for every choice you make in your parenting career? No? Huh, me either. Did you know that you would be looked down on based on your level of success over some things that are beyond your control? Or even for things that are “normal” for whatever age your child is? I had no idea. There should be a pre-requisite, crash-course for new parents on “How To Survive Judgement Day, Everyday.” Especially since, “How To Properly Judge Other Parents and Their Sub Par Children,” is already being offered.

A baby that still gets up in the night? A 2 year old that throws the occasional temper tantrum when about to be separated from you? A 4 year old that loves to run wild and investigate every inch of anything that could possibly make them dirty? *Gasp* What horrible parenting choices you’ve made that have brought you to that point! Nevermind the fact that each of these things are developmentally normal, your children should be above that. It leaves me wondering if carrying around children has replaced the miniature animals in the latest accessory craze. Today’s children are molded into adult life, instead of the adult’s life being molded around the child’s. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that you do anything and everything your child requests, and that your life is suddenly completely over while you live out theirs. But when did it become acceptable to let your newborn go hungry just because it wasn’t on your schedule? Or to plop your toddler in front of the TV for HOURS so that you can catch up on whatever it is you would rather be doing than keeping a toddler out of trouble. Or to feed your children soda and chips because you don’t feel like making them an actual meal? I’m not saying that there’s never any exceptions or that parents don’t deserve a break, because sometimes you do have to fit them into the day’s schedule. But come on! I just cannot fathom why people try to have children, and then fail to actually treat them like children. Your newborn is going to need to eat all the time, even at night. Past 6 months. Yes, there are ways around it, and children are highly adaptable. That does not, however, mean that is what’s best for your child. And yes, breastfeeding is best, even though it’s not always seen as easiest, because it is more physically demanding. Is it always easiest for you to pump away you lunch break? No, it’s not. (And pumping isn’t a whole lotta fun, either.) Is it still what’s best? Yes. Is it more time consuming to teach my children to play and actually play with my children and foster their imaginations (than to let PBS do it for me)? Probably. Is it better for them? Of course. Would I be more likely to obtain my dream of a perfectly groomed home? Obviously.

How is it that parents are so quick to forget that their babies are just that? And instead expect full nights of sleep along with full days of cooperation. These are not adults in child form, these are children. When did we lose sight of that? I feel like a minority in my belief that while they obviously need parenting, children are children, and should be treated as such. Even if (and when) it means that it’s not what is most convenient for me.

I’d ask my children how they feel about this, but the three of them are currently busy playing my electric piano’s sound effects and developing a story line around them, while building a city to go along with it. 

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